The United Socialist States of Coca-Cola Citadel is a colossal, safe nation, notable for its barren, inhospitable landscape, compulsory military service, and zero percent divorce rate. The devout population of 7.893 billion Coca-Cola Citadelians are prohibited from doing almost everything except voting, which they do timidly and conservatively.

The medium-sized, moralistic government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Spirituality. The average income tax rate is 31.3%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The large but inefficient Coca-Cola Citadelian economy, worth 262 trillion regions a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Uranium Mining industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Book Publishing, and Retail. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 33,218 regions, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Adultery has been made a capital offence, drug lords often avoid prison time by teaching "chemistry" classes to underprivileged youth, police officers that upset their bosses get assigned to 24 hour stakeouts of bike sheds, and all government communication requires the imprimatur of the Truth Police. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force. Coca-Cola Citadel's national animal is the black hawk, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to toxic air pollution.

Coca-Cola Citadel is ranked 199,924^th in the world and 4,851^st in Suspicious for Highest Food Quality, scoring 11.94 on the Meeshlin-Starr Index.